Guess what, kids? Annoying people exist everywhere! I learned this when I visited San Francisco recently. As I waited for the Muni, a very loquacious lady struck up a conversation with me. Apparently this is something people do on the West Coast.

“I’m visiting from Berkeley,” she told me (what an adventure! That’s like me visiting Queens.). “And I never drive here. The drivers are just terrible. When I first moved here I got into an accident, which was my fault, but it was with a kid my son’s age.”

So much to unpack here. So the terrible drivers to whom she was referring would be herself, who lived in the Bible Belt before (we covered a lot of ground in these four minutes), so it’s not really San Francisco’s fault, now, is it? I don’t think the city requested her presence.  Also, the accident was San Francisco’s fault because it was with a kid her son’s age (which I presume is young)…so somehow that’s worse even though she caused the accident, so it could have been with anyone? Like it should have been his fault even though it was hers?

Anyway, I commented that the driving was worse in New York.

“You’re from New York?” she asked.

I told her that I lived there, but originally came from New England.

“Oh, that must be why you’re friendly then.”

However, the people on the West Coast still aren’t friendly enough for Chatty Kathy. Apparently everyone in big cities is cold.

“They have Muni in New York, too, don’t they? Or what do they call it?”

“The subway.”

“Right!”